Woman Desperate for Fun Gets Freaked Out by Creepy Beards

I was in the mood for some frivolous fun - something ludicrous, wacky and guaranteed to make us laugh (or at least groan and grin).   So, I went in search of that something special. 

"Frivolous fun.....Frivolous fun"  (Women frowns intently at her computer screen).   Nothing came to me.

So I Googled frivolous fun.  I got a hit about a resort, a cook book, and funny glasses.  I checked out the site about glasses, expecting something like this:

Clarabell likes to stand out in the herd

Or this:

Boy invents x-ray goggles and discovers the truth about female anatomy

But it was just a site about tacky souvenir wine goblets.  Very disappointing.

So I tried again using different search words:  "All Things Ludicrous" and came up with The Financial Philosopher (ack!); "Wacky Fun" - a vending machine factory (yawn!); and then, getting desperate, I tried searching for "More Fun Than a Barrel of Monkeys" which, after a long and convoluted path eventually led to a fun website dedicated to a new fad in facial hair.

So....after possibly the longest introduction you've ever read on any blog post ever, I'm happy to present my offering of wacky and frivolous fun - monkeytail beards!

Yes.  These guys are for real.

Apparently it's the latest fad in facial hair and even has it's own web page -  The Monkeytail.com because dot awesome wasn't an option.  The satirical site (which warns "The Monkeytail is not intented to be a factual statement") encourages the proud owners of monkeytail beards to submit photos of themselves (usually shirtless in their bathrooms) to be posted on the website.  The witty and sarcastic writers at themonkeytail.com then have some hilarious fun lampooning the poor smucks.

Here's a sampling of their work:

Tired of Akward Family Dinners?

Bring the Monkeytail to your next family dinner and your father will stop asking what you're doing with your life and start questioning, "What the hell is on your face?" You can proudly respond, "Well, dad, I'm a pioneer! I am the Daniel Freakin' Boone of awesome beards!" He'll still be disappointed in you, but at least it'll create the illusion that he's proud.  

The site also has a link to The Beard Coach, a website that will provide you with all the information you need to grow and maintain your own monkeytail beard and is worth a visit just to see the photo of Hans Langseth's 17' beard. 

So fellows, if you're thinking a monkeytail beard may be just the thing you need to give you that little extra sparkle with the ladies, here's some advice -

don't do it!