"To the outside world we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time."
-- Clara Ortega
My big sister & me
Those of you with a sharp eye may have noticed that my sister looks a little familiar to you. If you guessed Velma Dinkley, then you win a Scooby Snack because it's true - my sister is indeed Velma Dinkley from Scooby Doo.
Here's the proof.
Just like her cartoon character, my brainiac sister is brilliant and bookish and knows all the answers to everything. Born to decipher clues and solve crimes, she devours mystery novels like cotton candy. She is my biggest supporter and greatest defender, always ready to rush in and rip the mask off any monster I may be facing, saving the day by proving any overblown fears are none other than Old Man Travers, the Caretaker.
That's my sister. When we lost our father to cancer, and then our mother to a brain tumour, it was my sister who was my rock. While others feared she would falter and fall back upon old addictions, she remained solid in her determination to be a support to me. My tenacious Velma is steadfast in her role of Big Sister.
So, when that mighty brain of hers first began to fail, I was suspicious. When I caught myself having to explain the obvious to her, I was alarmed. When the small cracks that appeared in her memory widened to become yawning fissures into which tumbled first her energy, then her ambition, and finally her spirit, I was terrified.
I attempted to reverse our roles. She could be Daphne Blake, the clumsy danger-prone damsel in distress and I would be the one to rescue her with my love and determination. I would support her, and protect her, and fight for her. I would give her my strength to use while hers failed.
But the role of big sister is apparently not one you easily cast off. When the long months of doctor appointments and tests ended with the diagnosis of a brain tumour, my sister turned to me and said,
"I feel so bad for you... that you have to go through this again."
It seems, no matter what our age, no matter what twists and turns life throws at us, I will forever be the younger sister in that photo, and she will always be my Velma.
Part III Down the Rabbit Hole
As someone who is very close to my older sisters, this post really touched my heart. I'm so sorry for your sister's illness, and I hope for her recovery. Beautiful post, hugs to you both.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what you must be going through. That quote at the top of the page, really does say it in so little words. I'm so sorry and I'll be praying for her recovery. Stay strong in each others arms. I know you will.
ReplyDeleteOhhh this made me cry. I am the big sister (by 11 years) and it's very hard to shrug off that mantle, no matter what is going on in my own life. I'm so happy that you guys have that relationship. I hope everything will turn out ok with her. ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, she has a heart of gold, doesn't she? I hope that this is something operable. I am the oldest too but all my siblings are brothers. The one closet to my age, acts like I am the little sister. I honestly don't know what I'd do without him. I will be thinking of y'all every day. Please keep us posted.
ReplyDeleteBlimey Kara, have you only just found out about your sisters illness? That is just awful... I really hope that she conquers it. Keep us updated won't you my lovely?
ReplyDeleteHow heart-breaking. Your sister sounds like she's very special, and still wanting to take care of you, when she's the one who needs to be taken care of. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to hear about your sister's diagnosis. It sounds like she's will always be Velma to you.
ReplyDeleteYour love for your sister and hers for you, shines through your words. What a touching tribute.
ReplyDeleteThis is wonderfully written and has the reader {me} feeling the emotion, the joy of sister-hood and the love. May this only be a bump in the road of her life, something that strengthens her and you, to find one another holding hands and facing the world boldly at the end of the journey.
ReplyDeleteBless you both ♥
This is indeed wonderfully written, and I, like others, am sorry for this challenge. And I'm a bit jealous. I wish I had a relationship like this with my older sister. Sending good thoughts your way for healing and wholeness.
ReplyDeleteI am with Galen on the jealousy part - it was so freeing to be able to release my relationship with my big sister when my mother died; I just let it go.
ReplyDeleteI am hoping that the brain tumor is curable, and that because your Mother taught you about this problem you were able to discover it early, which seems to be a good thing.
Sending healing thoughts to you both...and I just reviewed a book called THE LONG GOODBYE by Megan O'Rourke and her research within the memoir is invaluable. You could win a copy if you make a comment before the 22nd - Patricias Wisdom FYI
I feel the love between sisters, I feel it with my own. I will think good thoughts to you and your families.
ReplyDeleteThis is perhaps one of the most beautifully written posts I've ever seen. So touching and so real.
ReplyDeleteYou both are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm glad you have your family to help you through.
This post has made me tingley all over with goosebumps. I have always wanted a sister. I feel so fortunate that in a little while I will be adding another girl to our already, 2 girl 1 boy combo.
ReplyDeleteI pray that they support each other the way you and your family have.
Much love x
Wow, what a moving post. Conjures up a lot of emotions, especially for someone whose sister has been kind enough to let him live with her for the past two months and probably another two more while I'm in transition to a new marriage/house/life. My prayers are with you and your sister. Great writing, too, by the way...
ReplyDeleteJinkys! That was beautiful.
ReplyDeleteFor all the joking I do about my brothers and sister, I wouldn't have it any other way!
I have just found your blog. It is wonderful. I too enjoy humour, but this post is truly touching. The bond between yourself and your sister shines through. I wish you both strength to deal with this illness.
ReplyDeleteI love you Kara
ReplyDeleteJinkys! That was beautiful.
ReplyDeleteFor all the joking I do about my brothers and sister, I wouldn't have it any other way!
Wow, what a moving post. Conjures up a lot of emotions, especially for someone whose sister has been kind enough to let him live with her for the past two months and probably another two more while I'm in transition to a new marriage/house/life. My prayers are with you and your sister. Great writing, too, by the way...
ReplyDeleteThis is perhaps one of the most beautifully written posts I've ever seen. So touching and so real.
ReplyDeleteYou both are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm glad you have your family to help you through.
I am with Galen on the jealousy part - it was so freeing to be able to release my relationship with my big sister when my mother died; I just let it go.
ReplyDeleteI am hoping that the brain tumor is curable, and that because your Mother taught you about this problem you were able to discover it early, which seems to be a good thing.
Sending healing thoughts to you both...and I just reviewed a book called THE LONG GOODBYE by Megan O'Rourke and her research within the memoir is invaluable. You could win a copy if you make a comment before the 22nd - Patricias Wisdom FYI
Your love for your sister and hers for you, shines through your words. What a touching tribute.
ReplyDeleteHow heart-breaking. Your sister sounds like she's very special, and still wanting to take care of you, when she's the one who needs to be taken care of. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteBlimey Kara, have you only just found out about your sisters illness? That is just awful... I really hope that she conquers it. Keep us updated won't you my lovely?
ReplyDeleteOhhh this made me cry. I am the big sister (by 11 years) and it's very hard to shrug off that mantle, no matter what is going on in my own life. I'm so happy that you guys have that relationship. I hope everything will turn out ok with her. ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteSo beautifully painted. There is no wonder to me why you won the BlogHer award. I am going to search your blog to find a follow-up, though. How is your sister doing? How are you doing? Thinking of you both. Congrats, again, on the award.
ReplyDelete