2011-07-19

Nasty Names, Hocus Pocus, and Really Bad Puns

When we bought our sailboat, it came with the most inane and inappropriate moniker (which I can NEVER EVER pronounce again for fear of dooming the boat to Neptune's depths) glued to the hull in an electric-blue vinyl stencil.  In an ugly font.    A LARGE ugly font.

As I stood in my driveway, armed with a hot air gun and nail polish remover, struggling to remove the nasty name off the boat's hull, a neighbour and fellow sailor hurried over to warn me of the peril of my actions.

"You can't change the name!  You'll be cursed!  You'll have nothing but bad luck forever!"

Apparently, sailors are a superstitious lot.  And I wasn't buying it.  I mean...it was a really horrible name! I was willing to tempt fate to change it.  I was willing to stand toe to toe with Neptune, shake my fist in his face and dare him to curse my boat!  But, (just in case) I googled "how to safely rename your boat".  

After being warned again of the perils of changing a boat's name, I found some helpful advice that recommended a bit of hocus pocus that would protect the boat from Neptune's wrath.  It involved destroying all traces of the original name, reciting an incantation, and sacrificial champagne - lots and lots of champagne.

With that done, the real job began - deciding on a new name. Not an easy feat.  Some of our considerations were La Dolce Vita, Carpe Diem, and Bella Kara (it was during my Italian phase) before finally deciding on the name Interlude (even though one friend told me it sounded too Tiger Woodsy).  Well...phwwwttt to her.



Okay.  Maybe it's a bit cheesy.   But I prefer to think of it as following the sailors' tradition of choosing romantic names for their boats, like Serenity, Windsong and Gypsy Dancer.

Power boaters, on the other hand, seem to prefer using really bad puns as names.  And you know I  love really bad puns.  Here are some of my favourites:





Then there's the tradition of naming your boat after your lover:


Ahem....


So, what's your favourite boat name?  

20 comments:

  1. Les BotcharJuly 19, 2011

    One of our favourite pastimes in the city I grew up in, was going down to the marina and looking at the boat's name. Some of my faves: A Yacht of Fun, Seas the Day, various puns on Breaking or Passing Wind, and 3 Sheets to the Wind.

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  2. WhisperingWriterJuly 19, 2011

    Wasted Seamen made me giggle.

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  3. 2 More Payments

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  4. Oh Matey! Me likes the last one. But ummm, errr, if me had to name me boat, me might name er "Nice Aft" or "Wet-Ever".

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  5. Oh! Those are good ones! Love the pirate accent too ;)

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  6. What? You're buying a boat? And the name?

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  7. "Seas the Day" - that's a popular one!

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  8. Clipped WingsJuly 19, 2011

    Funny post. I'm not really a sea person, except to wade the beach.

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  9. susan swiderskiJuly 19, 2011

    I love these boat names, but I'm a sucker for a pun. Years ago, my uncle promised my aunt a mink coat. But he really wanted a new boat. He ended up getting it, too. Named it "Doris's Mink."

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  10. Love it! - Although I doubted Doris appreciated it.

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  11. Oooh I don't have a boat name... love the names on the boats... I always laugh at some of the boat names I see around here (I live in Lake County..every has a boat except me!). I'll let you know if I think of something amusing... currently it would probably 'Eric the Viking' (see todays blog!!)

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  12. Haha! And now I'm REALLY curious about what your boat's old name was. (I love Interlude, by the way :D)

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  13. My lips are sealed.

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  14. haha! I love that last one. I have to admit, if I was naming my boat after my lover, mine would have more than just the back all marked up. We have a boat, and we never named it, and within days of taking it out on the Petawawa River, the motor got stuck in a sandbar, and the dan thning has been sitting in my step-dad's lot in a smalltown in Manitoba ever since. I would never admit to being supersticious, but this time, I may have to lean towards the sailors' philosophies.

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  15. AlpenwasserJuly 20, 2011

    Rather than taking the chance of incurring Neptune's wrath, how about writing the name of your boat in Latin? That way, only college professors (and ancient Romans) would understand. As far as your video clip, it's pretty funny.
    But, sometimes a cigar is only a cigar.
    And, my favorite boat name is the last one. That's really pretty clever.

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  16. Al, a cigar is NEVER just a cigar.

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  17. You didn't tell us the name that you settled on in the end. LOL - those pun names are seriously cheesey - I think your shortlist shows far more class dahlink! And if changing boat names involves champagne, I may take it up as a career!

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  18. Kristy LorenzenJuly 20, 2011

    Oh, goodness, those are some outrageous boat names. This is like getting a tattoo. I've never been able to because that means you have to COMMIT to whatever it is, you know? Picking a boat name would be hard. I'd probably end up having my child pick the name and then it would be something like Matt Baby (that's what he named our fish).

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  19. Matt Baby is a perfectly good name for a fish! When my son was young, he
    named his fish David - go figure :)

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  20. What a great idea! A career changing boat names! We should definitely partner up for this venture. I could use my past experience with changing a boat's name, and you could use your expertise at, well...champagne, and we'd make a great team! I'm not sure there's much money in it, but I know we'd have a great time!

    And we did call the boat Interlude, even though it may be a cheesy, sleezy, Tiger Woodsy sort of name. It means "a break or pause" and as we use it as our weekend getaway, it suits.

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